Praying with feeling.

I love the story of David.  He is by far one of my favorite people in the Bible.  I get him.  Even through those ancient words, I really feel like I understand his heart, and am wired very similarly myself.  He came from modest origins, was just up and anointed king by Samuel yet proceeded back to his sheep, he was forced on the run by a king turned crazy, but had faith in God's plan for him every step of the way.  He was far from perfect, but always sought to reconcile himself with his God.  Do I even need to bring up Goliath? 

But his heart!  I can just feel his anguish, I can feel his overwhelming joy, and his prayer life with God in a time before Jesus, before having the Holy Spirit in each of God's people.  THAT is what I love most about David.  So many Psalms just openly pouring out his love for his God, and I can feel everything behind every word.  I'm a very emotional, passionate person and the fact that one favored by God was the same way makes me feel a little less crazy.  I too have always poured my heart out before God, but when it was made aware to me that many people don't do this, I actually began to worry I was "doing prayer wrong".  I was still pretty new in my faith, and was still finding myself looking to others to show me how to be a "proper Christian", but I actually let it get to me.  Then I read through Samuel and 2 Samuel.  I read about David literally dancing for joy in the streets, I read how he sought out the remaining descendants of Saul specifically to show God's kindness to them, I read stories of how he would weep and fast, faced the consequences of his sins, yet would always praise the Lord with all his heart even when faced with unimaginable difficulties.  It all just resonated so clearly to me, and I felt I needed to take note of that.

I never want to know a prayer life that is any different.  I never want to grow ashamed of constantly crying to God, emptying my heart for Him to see, hiding absolutely nothing.  I trust Him with my pain, I thank Him for everything, and I LOVE my Lord with all my heart.  And now I leave you with a Psalm.  Psalm 138:

¹ I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart;
    before the “gods” I will sing your praise.
² I will bow down toward your holy temple
    and will praise your name
    for your unfailing love and your faithfulness,
for you have so exalted your solemn decree
    that it surpasses your fame.
³ When I called, you answered me;
    you greatly emboldened me.

⁴ May all the kings of the earth praise you, Lord,
    when they hear what you have decreed.
⁵ May they sing of the ways of the Lord,
    for the glory of the Lord is great.

⁶ Though the Lord is exalted, he looks kindly on the lowly;
    though lofty, he sees them from afar.
⁷ Though I walk in the midst of trouble,
    you preserve my life.
You stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes;
    with your right hand you save me.
⁸ The Lord will vindicate me;
    your love, Lord, endures forever—
    do not abandon the works of your hands.